I smashed my finger in a door at the Post Office today. My entire hand has turned blue and purple, and I am convinced that it will fall off tomorrow. It is twice the size it should be. Also I can't use my pointer finger, which makes typing excessively difficult. You are so lucky to be getting this update.
Also, I would just like to note that Googling "bruised nail" returns a surprising number of sites, but clicking on them is unwise. I am about 13,000 times more terrified that I'm about to lose my finger than I was before asking the Internets what to do about it. Unfortunately, the only advice the Internets provide that doesn't make me feel sick to my stomach is to put ice on the little blue guy, which, at this time, makes my finger hurt even worse.
Becca, you better be so nice to me for sending you that stupid postcard 'cause this is a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.
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